Harkness Memorial State Park: A place for my heart

One of my favorite parks in CT is Harkness Memorial State Park in Waterford. The first time I went there, my then boyfriend got down on one knee and proposed. We were married there nearly ten years ago. Now it is a special place we bring our kids once a year. With beautiful buildings and gardens, a beach that is suited for digging up shells and sea glass, and a huge lawn for flying kites and picnicking, Harkness is the perfect backdrop to a day out with the family. 

You can host your big family get together at Harkness. Just get there early to claim a set of picnic tables and a cooker. We always walk past a smoking grill and probably drool a little! We definitely have to host a reunion there someday, so that our food can be the envy of other park-goers!

If you choose Harkness as your wedding destination, you can rent the outdoor stage area or the impressive mansion. Either way your guests will be wowed and your photos, beautiful. 

We have lost a kite in one of the tall trees skirting the edges of the sprawling lawn. 

On our most recent trip, last Sunday, we brought the girls' bikes and they road the big loop that passes by the stables, gift shop and gardens. The kids trotted through the Mansion gardens before the wedding that just happened to be scheduled started. They pretended to be fairies and yes , I'll admit, I was so inspired by the iron gates overgrown with ivy, the tranquil fountains and tiny pathways, I pretended to be a fairy too! Go for the entire day or just a couple of hours and know you'll have a good time regardless. 

Tips and cost:

We happened to go on the last Sunday that they were charging, but it was still only $6.00. If you were to go now, it would be free. 

Pack a lunch, kite, bikes, frisbee or throwing ball of your choice. 

Pets allowed but must be leashed and please clean up after it. 

Plan on doing a lot of walking and taking a lot of pictures! 

A Familyof5 Visits Santa's Village

If your kids are anything like my kids, they love birthdays! And they will talk about their birthday all year long. The invitation to a friend's birthday will start a whole new passion for their own upcoming birthday - that is really 6 months away! Jaidyn will talk about what theme her birthday will be, who she will invite, and where she will have it. And it changes with the weather!

This year, about a month before her 7th birthday, Jaidyn made a very surprising choice. She did not want to have a big birthday party with a Star Wars theme (which was the theme she had recently landed on). Instead she wanted to go on a family vacation! (A girl after my own heart ;-)

We discussed different ideas and finally decided on Santa's Village, in Jefferson New Hampshire. We had been 2 years before and had enjoyed it then, and it was just about a 5 hour drive from where we live, which is about all I can take in a car with three kids.

After doing a little research on the Santa's Village website, which is great, by the way, we discovered that if you tell them in advance that a child is celebrating a birthday, they go the extra mile to make sure it is special. When you get there, let the person in the ticket sale window know about the birthday guest. They will give them a sticker to wear, that has their name pre-printed on it.

Employees who saw Jaidyn's birthday sticker wished her a happy birthday. When we went into the Polar Theatre, the employee had the entire audience sing "Happy Birthday" to her. At the end of our day we stopped in to see Santa and he had a special gift just for Jaidyn. All of this was at no extra cost. The only downside was that poor little Addy didn't quite understand why her big sister was getting so much extra attention, and when Santa asked her what she wanted for Christmas this year, she replied "a birthday." Of course, in the fashion of every little child, she has been talking about her birthday all summer, and how she wants to go to Santa's Village. I shiver just thinking about it because her birthday is in January!

Overall, we love this theme park for a family trip with small children. It is clean, which is huge on my list. It is easy to get around and the grounds are beautifully maintained with gorgeous flowers. All the rides are appropriate for young children, so if you have an older child who enjoys thrill rides, they may not be so thrilled. Unless of course they like watersides. A fairly new attraction to to the park is the water play area. There are two big slides as well as two little slides and even a baby area! Its perfect for cooling down on a hot day. For unprepared parents, the gift shop sells towels, suits and swim diapers. But we were prepared - this time - two years before Jaidyn left in wet clothes!

My favorite part of the park is meeting Santa's Reindeer. I really had never seen actual reindeer and they are so cute! For a little extra you can buy them food and feed them by hand.

Human food at the park is reasonably priced with many healthy options, but there are also many areas to sit and open up your cooler packed with snacks and sandwiches.

If you get there when they open, or shortly after, one day is really all you need. Lines are not bad, at least they weren't the weekend when we went, and if you have a couple days in New Hampshire, you might want to bring the family on a short hike or drive up Mt. Washington.

We stayed at The Royalty Inn, just as we had our previous visit. We liked it because it has an indoor, heated pool, which many of the area motels do not, and all rooms had a fridge and microwave, at no extra cost. Also, coffee in the lobby every morning was a plus for tired mommy! We did not, however, like the restaurant next door. The food was greasy and the dining area was in the same open room as the very rowdy bar, which I would not expose my children to. I ordered food to go and we ate at one of the tables next to the outdoor pool.

In two years I plan on bringing everyone up to New Hampshire again, maybe enjoy some of the other area attractions, maybe do a little camping and hiking. Use the Santa's Village website to plan your trip. It lists all types of places to stay or camp.

Trip Tips:

1. Pack entertainment bags for each kid for the long car ride.
2. Try to plan the car ride to include at least one nap time.
3. A movie in the car, your phone, or a portable DVD player goes a long way, so make sure all batteries are fully charged.
4. Plan on taking a stretch break every two hours.
5. Plan games to play in the car with your kids, when naps are had and movies are over. We like to play eye spy. Singing is fun too. For a minute.

If you have ideas for long car rides I would love for you to add them in the comment box. I am not so good with the long car rides, I tend to go coo coo before the kids do!

6. For Santa's Village pack waters for everyone, swim stuff and maybe a picnic lunch.

Have fun!

Fair Day

Besides back to school shopping, perhaps one of the true signs that summer has reached its end is that presence of local fairs. We have always gone to fairs. Before we had kids my husband and I liked to go to the Big E. For those of you that are not from this area, the Big E is a huge fair in Springfield, Mass, and all the New England states participate. We like to look at the venders in the Lifestyle building. There is always some new gadget to get. The first year we went to the Big E together, I spent $250 on a "Bamix." I thought it was the best kitchen tool ever. They must not have had a good patent on it, because less then a year later the "Magic Bullet" came out and was sold on T.V. for $19.99! It was essentially the same thing.

Another year we went and bought these two swinging patio chairs. They were over $200 a piece but were super comfortable. We hung them from our pergola on our deck, and enjoyed them for a summer, but by the following season they were ruined. Not meant to get wet, apparently. My point is that the Big E is not a very budget friendly place. Go there planning to spend money, not save it. Even if you somehow manage to not buy anything (which you will not), they charge you to park, it is expensive to get in, and of course you will be buying food. Not to mention the gas it takes to get there if you live two hours away like we do.

So our family has come to enjoy going to one small local fair a year. The kids love to see the animals, we get a little taste of the fatty fair foods, and enjoy a few kiddie rides. Most years we go to the Haddam Neck fair. They have a dog agility show, pony rides, face painting, a small circus performance, the racing pig show, a few rides, and all your favorite fair foods. Last year we went with the girls and I was 8 months pregnant with Grayson. It was nice not to have to do too much walking. Its out in a grassy field, so there's plenty of places to lay a blanket out and rest with the kiddos.

This year we thought we would try something different and go to the Chester fair. Its small as well, even smaller then the Haddam neck fair. Parking was free and it was only $8 each for the adults to get in, kids were free. Love places that let kids in for free! Someone out there knows that when you have kids you will be spending a lot more money inside the fair gates then people going in without kids. They should charge those people extra!

The nice thing about fairs is the "free" entertainment. There was a clown sort of character, putting on a show for the kids. The racing pigs were there. They had the dog agility show. And of course the calves, goats, sheep, rabbits, ducks, chickens and roosters. Once the kids had there fill of animals, we lathered up with Purel and headed to the food venders. Trying to pick out a somewhat healthy option at a fair can be challenging. I gave up and allowed the girls to have fried dough, which was $6. They were going to share. Jimmy had the Taste of Thai, which was probably the healthiest food there (and yummiest) and I had perogies (I thought they would be something special, but they were basically the kind you can buy in the freezer section of the grocery store). His was $7 and mine was $4.00. So we spent $17 on our lunch. Thank goodness I had brought waters for everyone, or it would be another $3 per person.

On to the kiddie rides. It was $25 for a sheet of 20 tickets. and rides were 3 tickets each. I ended up one ticket short and had to spend an extra $2.00 for an additional ticket. Each girl went on 3 rides and I went on one with them. I definitely did not feel like it was money well spent. I can't even imagine how much it is going to cost in two more years, when Grayson will be going on rides as well (and eating regular food). We never do the games, even though the kids always bug us to. We don't need any more stuffed animals in this house and if the kids lose, they cry. After about 30 minutes we were out of tickets, so we figured it was time to get everyone a little treat. If they didn't get us on the food, they got us on the ice cream, because of course everyone wants their own. And poof! Another $20.00 added to our tally. I think I used half a box of wipes to clean the ice cream sundae mess off the girls. But that is all a part of the fun.

It seems a familyof5 can do a small country fair for around $80.00, plus gas, if you bring your own water, don't go crazy with the rides, and one of the kids isn't riding or eating (Grayson is still eating baby foods, but did have a little of Jimmy's Thai chicken).

As I ponder how we fared at the fair, I feel a little let down. It was still a nice day, but was it worth eighty dollars? Would we have enjoyed ourselves more if we had gone to the Big E, with its big circus tent, its horse show, its Lifestyle building of gadgets and gismos? Maybe next year. But one fair a year is all I want to budget for. And I will not put this down as a budget friendly staycation idea. But it is definitely something the family can enjoy together.

Tips for going to the fair:
Try to choose a cooler day. Hot days at fairs are not fun.
Pack water (freeze a bottle, so it is cold longer and keeps the other bottle cold)
Bring snacks, and maybe food for the picky eater in the family. I bring GoGo squeezes for everyone. They are all natural, just applesauce. Even 10 month old Grayson can handle it on his own.
Pack hats, sunscreen, wipes & Purel.
Bring a blanket to sit on (We have one we bought at Costco long ago, and we bring it everywhere we go. It has a nylon bottom, so it doesn't get gross, and still works if the ground is damp. If you ever see one of these, I highly recommend it).
If your kids are older and really love rides, look into buying them each a wrist band, so they can go as many times as they want.
If you are going to one of the bigger fairs, such as the Big E, speak with your spouse ahead of time about what you might be spending there. Those spontaneous purchases can kill a family on a budget and start an argument. And since you're at a fair, they're usually not returnable.

Soon I plan on doing a blog about how budgeting keeps us on track. I would love to share how budgeting and going debt free has changed our lives forever.





"You never know who you'll see at the fair!" "A goat watching me." "Baby calf" and "Kiddie rides."

Summer Wishes

"Schools out for the summer - and I have one week off. I have 7 days to play with my kids, connect with my husband, and maybe, just maybe, squeeze in a little me time."

Those were the very first words I typed in my blog. I saved that one sentence as a draft and never finished it. I "wished it" back in June, at the beginning of my first vacation week of the summer. I realize that the reason I never actually finished and posted it was because I didn't do a lot of what I had hoped. Or so I believed. There's something to be said for summer expectations. Several parents I have spoken with have complained that summer seems to go by so fast. You try to squeeze in too much and feel let down if you can't do everything. Or an unwelcome weather  change (such as the extreme heat wave that we experienced in Connecticut the week of my July vacation), can ruin all plans of summer staycation fun.

I must admit, I too, got caught up in the lamenting of summer wishes gone un-accomplished. I looked at that first blog sentence of only a few words, yet heavy with expectation. I felt as though I had let myself and my family down: I should have done more. When the heat wave rolled across our Shore, I hid from it inside. Who wants to go to the beach with three small children when its ninety degrees outside? When I went back to work I felt like I should have done more. More. More. More. There will always be that word, "more."

Today summer is officially over. I sent my two oldest off to school. Jaidyn, entering second grade, was too excited to sleep last night and was up bright and early, eager to see old friends and meet new ones. My little Addy, who is starting pre-school, was just the opposite. She was a little nervous when I dropped her off this morning, but had a small smile on her face as she shyly looked around at the other kids in her class.  Both girls have expectations of things to come in the school year. Just as I put pressure on my self to make my family and I have the "perfect summer."

This makes me think about those summer wishes. I don't think I did too badly after all. We managed to go on at least eight day trips on my days off, most of which I blogged about or plan to blog about. The blogging is my "me-time." And I did connect with my kids. They are happy with the simple things, like playing school and Polly Pockets and games inside when it was too hot to go out. And I think my husband and I managed to go on one date night.  So I have no regrets for summer, despite that ever-existing word "more."

 Besides, Fall on the shoreline is arguably one of the most pleasant seasons, filled with fun staycation ideas for families, including one of my favorites, pumpkin picking! But I'll try not to set my expectations too high ;-)

A Family of 5 Visits the Zoo

One of my favorite places to go on a family day trip that is close by and moderately priced is the Roger Williams Park Zoo. We bought a zoo membership last fall when we went to the annual Jack-O-Lantern Spectacular (a great time to see the animals and see some creatively cut pumpkins). It has been so hot this summer (at least on my days off) that we had only used our membership twice. So when the weathermen forecast  last Thursday to be one of the best days of the year, I packed the hubby, three kids and our day bag into my van and off we went.

Of, course, its never quite that easy - we didn't leave until noon and I hadn't packed a lunch as I usually do, so by the time we stopped at the Subway located just down the street from the zoo, ate lunch next to the Shakespearean style amphitheater in the park, it was almost two o'clock by the time we made it through the zoo gates. I have said it before (to my family) and I will say it again - this Park has so much to offer a Family of 5 (or any number) that I could spend the whole day there. We just never leave in time. So pack up a picnic and leave early, reserving you plenty of time to enjoy the Swan Boats, Carousel, Duck Tours (seasonal), playground, all the park grounds, which are beautiful , as well as the zoo and animals themselves.

If you have not been to the Roger Williams Zoo in over a year, you will be pleasantly surprised by their new non-animal addition, nostalgically named, Our Big Backyard. Complete with a huge tree house where kids can go on a self-guided scavenger hunt, Our Big Backyard is a day of play in itself. In fact, we spent the majority of our time here, only visiting a few of the animals. There is a Creativity Corner, where kids can make musical melodies on rustic percussion instruments, while others can dress up and put on a show. There's a spot where the builders  can build there own fort, climbers can climb, and swingers can swing. But the best part of all was the water play area. Even babies can enjoy splashing in a small river, while older siblings drop fish in from the top and watch them float "downstream." Match the hoses to the co-ordinating colored faucets to make water sprinkle from different outlets. This is the perfect activity for a hot day, especially after the walk around the zoo. So remember those swim trunks!

Of course you will leave early and have the whole day, so enjoy all the animals and then head to the play area. The main reason I love this zoo, better then any other bigger zoo, is its small size. I can walk the loop and not miss any animals, not feel as though I have walked miles, and not feel as though the animals are cramped in tiny cages. The animals have very nice quarters, if I do say so myself, as a wild human looking in on them, that is. You are pretty close up to the animals, especially if you get there early and can watch any of the animal feedings or the elephant baths. We've seen the elephant baths once, and it was pretty interesting. I promise, the next time we go I will get rolling at the break of dawn (ha ha) and have a lot more to tell you about. We've done the carousel, its cheap and fun for kids of all ages. There's a big playground there, and many pretty areas to picnic. The duck tours are new, I think, and only run until the end of September, so we're hoping to go again and do that, as a late summer stay cation trip. Hey, who's to say summer ends when school begins? If the weather is nice, I say there will be beach days, lake days and zoo days! Stay tuned.

Quick tips for Roger Williams Park Zoo:
Leave Early (or you'll wish you had)
Pack a picnic
Pack swimsuits for the kids (nice changing rooms there)
Parking is free!

Zebras 

Grayson liked this wart hog

A place to build a fort

Water play and a tree house

More water play and painting with water. 

The Saga of Back to School Shopping

With every great summer staycation there always comes the inevitable: Back To School Shopping! I think I feel it a little bit more then most, since I'm right in the middle of it at Old Navy. Before school is out for the year, I am planning for it, with hiring and marketing. As soon as the last school bell rings, we are getting in backpacks and uniforms. Before I can get to the beach for the first dip of the season we are hot and heavy with the kids denim sale. And so this is how I get carried away with the whole BTS shopping extravaganza. I see people shopping and buying mass amounts of clothing for their children and I think to myself: "my kids must need clothes too!" Of course they do not. Every time something cute goes on sale I buy it, since its "practically free" with my discount. So you see, my kids do not need clothes. And if they ever do, they get them from Old Navy. I shop on my break and come home with bags of "surprises" for them to dig through. I would never buy clothes from anywhere else. Or so I had always sworn. Last week a family was checking out at my register, with a huge purchase of kids clothes, just like everybody else. I noticed  the little girl's outfit that she was wearing was not from Old Navy but was very cute indeed, so I asked where it was from. "Justice" the mother replied. "Oh, I never shop there. Too expensive," I replied. "Not today," she encouraged, "they're having a great sale. It's practically free." Hmmmm. Practically Free, I thought. Just like with my discount. Could there be some other place to shop and get great deals, other then Old Navy? I'd better check it out on my break. And so I did. At first glance it was a great sale. Everything was 50% off. But a second look at each price tag told a different story. These clothes were higher priced then anything I would ever even buy for myself! I wanted to turn and run out of that over-priced glitter ladden tween store. I should've. But then I saw the clearance racks. I LOVE CLEARANCE! And so I picked out a few cute tops for Jaidyn. She would love all the sparkles, glitter and layers. They were  marked down to slightly more then I would pay at Old Navy. I can just return them. I'm sure I'll return them. Well since I'm returning them, I may as well look at the jeans. She won't wear ON jeans, the waist is too uncomfortable. I found a stretchy, glittery pair with a soft banded elastic waist. They looked like they would fit. All three shirts would go with them as well. Of course that didn't matter, since I was planning on returning them after I bought them.  The jeans were $46.00! So at half price I was still paying $23. Way more then I ever pay for jeans for myself. I felt nauseous as I paid $53.00 to the cashier and walked away from the store with my tiny little bag containing three shirts, the over-priced, over-glitterized jeans and a couple of coupons the cashier had given me, to entice me to come back again and shop their "sale." 

I had almost convinced myself to not show Jaidyn the clothes. Just leave them in my locker and return them the next day. But something about having a cute "first day of school outfit" and knowing she would love the bedazzled clothes urged me to bring the Justice bag into the house, against my own better judgement. Deal done. Everything fit and looked cute as a button on her. She did little runway poses, pairing each different top with the trendy skinny jeans. I put the clothes away and told her we may return them still, but either way, she could not wear them until school started. "But mommy," she complained, "I always tell my friends you buy my clothes at Old Navy. These are my first non-Old Navy clothes! I can't wait to tell my friends that they're from Justice!" Those are the words I have been dreading to hear for years. It's the beginning of "girly problems" and worrying about what other people think of you. It's the start of shopping sprees and matierialism. I just want my daughter to wear budget-friendly, pay-with-cash, still very trendy (and sometimes glittery) clothes. I started something that I don't want to finish. Where's the Justice in that?

Beach Day

You really don't need me to tell you that the beach in Old Saybrook is one of the town's main draws. My husband and I always say, why go on vacation to some little beach town, when we live in one. Making Harvey's or Town Beach a must-do staycation activity.

Sheltered by Long Island, the stretch of beach along the Sound is perfect for kids. With its gentle waves, many sand bars, and various sea creatures dwelling between the tides, there is much to keep the kiddos curious and content for hours.

I personally like to go during the week, in the morning, getting there by 10am. Two or three hours is plenty of time for my young ones, and its easier for me to feed them lunch at home then it is to lug a cooler across the sand, along with all their toys, boogie boards, towels, chairs - you get the picture. If the morning doesn't work out, I will wait until the summer crowds have disbursed, grab a pizza from T.J's, and head to Town Beach to watch the sunset. Its still warm enough for swimming, and I don't have to worry about applying sticky sunscreen to three squirming bods.

I think all parents of young children have come to terms with the fact that the days of sun bathing face-down on a towel, reading a magazine until you choose to stop, and just slipping into the water effortlessly for a refreshing dip are long gone. Now, with children, going to the beach is slightly less relaxing. So me, I learn to find the humor in the situation. Take for instance the last time I headed out with the girls, arriving sometime in the late morning.

You know how there are beach people and non-beach people? Well Jaidyn, my 7 year old, is a Beach Bum. I think she's part fish, part sand crab. She will dig and swim, and bury and rinse - all day long. But Addy, my 3 year old has some different feelings about how everything at the beach - well, feels.
     At Harvey's beach you need to walk across some gushy mucky stuff during low tide, to walk to the waters edge and distant sand bars. You will most likely step on a few crunchy snails along the way. Addy squeals and climbs up my leg, adding to my already burdensome load.  When the wind blows her hair into her face she voices her frustration, ordering me to "pull it back." When she gets sand on her hands, she is upset that she can't wipe it off. So I show her how to rinse her hands in the water. But if a wave is slightly bigger then normal and splashes her in the eyes, she wails. And as soon as she makes it back to her towel with clean hands, she picks up a sand toy and her hands are "dirty" again. I ended up shaking out her towel, helping her rinse off, then carrying her to the center of her towel where I instructed her to sit "criss-cross applesauce" until it was time to go. She was happy as a clam, eating her snack, staying clean and dry, with just the occasional wind blowing a stray hair. I really had no choice but to laugh - either that or pack up and leave, but that wouldn't be any fun.  I'm hoping that with more visits to the beach Addy will become less sensitive to it.
Oh darn, I guess I'll have to go to the beach again soon, for little Addy's sake!

My 2 girls. Jaidyn literally digging right in. Addy refusing to have any part of it, and she definitely will not smile!

A picture of Addy at Town Beach at sunset. Taken a few days after her day of beach-sensory-overload. She almost lolls after she's come to terms with her "feelings" about it.